Arya: Welcome readers, both old and young, to the curious goings on of the Bookabet family featuring ME, Princess Arya the first. Prepare to be amazed, scintillated and astonished as I take you on this magical tour
I doubt this chapter will be as interesting as Arya makes out, but she is a natural born performer so you can expect her to over exaggerate a little!
Anyway, last time on the Bookabet legacy, both Arya and the youngest clan member Asriel celebrated their birthdays. Asriel developed a tendency to walk around rubbing his hands together, cackling madly and wishing for peoples misfortune. As you do … We left off with Arya trying her damned hardest to adopt/kidnap a unicorn. Spoiler alert, she didn’t manage it
Also, a quick apology if you’ve updated recently and I haven’t read or commented. Everyone has updated at the same time and I’m behind with my reading! I will get you though, so have no fear!
Also, Gelert here became immortal and continued to be Gelert. I don’t know why he’s guarding the car though?
Gelert: I just heard Arya mumbling about driving to the moon and dragging the unicorn back to earth with her bare hands. Both you and I know that letting her anywhere near this car is a recipe for disaster!
Ceridwen: EEEE-YAAAA WHAT THE HELL?!
Looks like Asriel is on the loose again …
I stand corrected … Adam?! But you’re the sensible one!!!!
Adam: I’m in a bad mood today and I thought it was about time I started living up to everyone’s expectations of how the anti-Christ is supposed to behave
Arya: One cannot believe that Queen Ceridwen set her royal bodyguard Gelert to spy on one … We’ll show them Eika, one will sit out here all day if one has to. One will get one’s hands on the royal carriage … One’s unicorn will not slip from one’s fingers that easily … Now, let’s formulate Plan B.
Asriel: You are in my way Apollo. How can I be an evil mad genius scientist if I can’t perfect my formula now whilst my mind is like a sponge?! I’m evil … you won’t like my version of time out!
Apollo: I’m sowwy! Please don’t hurt me!!!
When I can drag him away from playing with his kids toys, Franco spends most of his time working on his artistic skill for his LTW and so he can do the legacy portrait. This is his first offering for the heir portrait. It’s not bad, but I know he can do much better.
Gelert: Turn around missy and take those bills with you, unless you want me to bite off your foot and feed it to our skeletal maid. It’s ok for you, but I’m the one that has to find the money to pay for it.
Bonehilda: You ok there Gelert?
Gelert: I think I’ve got this Hilda.
Post Woman: Don’t you dare growl at me you BAD DOG! Do you know how many catalogues I have in my bag? It sure hurts when you are hit in the hindquarters with a rolled up catalogue!
Gelert: …Er, Bonehilda? You know I told you that I’ve got this? Well, it looks like I don’t. HELP!!!!
It looks like poor Gelert has finally bitten off more than he can chew.
Gelert: Now, what lesson were we on son? Lesson seven? Don’t believe the lies you are told. Cats aren’t our worst enemies … The mail carriers are. They have far more superior weapons and pose a far greater threat to the humans we guard. They must all be destroyed.
After that piece of fatherly advice/propaganda, Bonehilda lends her skeletal hand in training up Apollo for his future role as doggy heir.
Bonehilda: This trick is called BEG. Its particular helpful in manipulating the fleshy ones you live with into giving you all their food. Combine it with sad puppy dog eyes and you’ll want for nothing.
Who could resist that face?!
Meanwhile, Eika does her best Deefa impression.
See what I mean? The resemblance is uncanny!!
This looks like a good idea.
Ceridwen: Are you sure about this sweetheart? I’m having second thoughts about this. What if Asriel decides to blow up the house, and Arya decides to bring back capital punishment in retaliation? What if she manages to get the car keys back from Gelert and attempts to drive to the moon? I’m really starting to feel faint.
Franco: Don’t be silly babes, that’s the graphics failing to render. I’m sure you’re going to be fine. Besides, Adam is more than capable of managing to keep Arya and Asriel in line. The house will still be standing when we get home.
Arya: Hello my friends. The King and Queen have left the castle and the keys to the kingdom have been left in the hands of Prince Adam. One is throwing a banquet in the great hall this evening … What about Prince Adam? You forget. He’s feeling a bit … rebellious today. I’m sure we can bribe him with a certain lady friend of his.
I am of course, talking about Bailey Swain. Apparently, her stalking tendencies don’t daunt him one bit as he’s throwing all kinds of wishes for her. Could tonight be the night?
The party starts off swinging, with Moonlight Falls very own version of Romeo and Juliet leading the dancers. Damn, that werewolf sure can move! In flip flops of all things!
Of course, not everyone is enjoying the party.
Alice: For goodness sake, this party is so lame. When I grow up, I’m going to be rich and famous, and I’m going to throw such exclusive parties that everyone will want an invitation. I’ll just read my book so I don’t die of boredom until then.
And so a second Bookabet child rolls their Lifetime Want. This doesn’t really suit Alice, but maybe she wants to become a famous author or the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize to combat whatever trouble her youngest brother reaps on the world.
Apollo: You’ve got a long way to go until you’re rich and famous kid. Until then, you’re my own personal slave and I want some food. Go and fill my food bowl will ya?
Looks like Ceridwen wasn’t wrong about Asriel blowing up the house.
Asriel: *coughs* I’ve got a way to go before my deep freeze formula is perfected. Maybe it was four drops of salt and one drop of carbon?
Arya: Why is this person gyrating before me? He won’t pass Knight school with moves like that … maybe he should spend some time riding a horse for practice.
Tristan Van Gould: That Arya sure is fine. I bet she has exotic tasting blood. The insane ones usually do … Hi Arya, dance with me. You don’t want to dance with that goon.
Nymeria: Are you ok my princess? Do you want me to set the hounds on this bozo?
Arya: No thank you Nymeria. One is quite capable of taking care of oneself. Besides, Sir Right-Hand is here as my loyal bodyguard should be. Besides, this persons awful dancing is quite interesting.
Asriel: On second thoughts, I think it was three drops of salt.
Looks like Asriel is making sure that the party goes off with a bang … awful pun I know. Don’t all yell at me at once!
Arya: Welcome to my fair kingdom good sir. This kingdom grew from a tiny seed and grew from the breath of unicorns. Unicorns are important you know, because they live on the moon and eat magical moon dust …
Tristan: Why won’t she pay any attention to me?
I don’t know Tristan. Maybe it’s because you keep threatening to suck her blood?
Arya: … The unicorns love this kingdom because King Franco was born on the moon and he is the greatest artist in this kingdom.
Joe MacDuff: *WTF?*
Joe: You make absolutely no sense but I like you anyway Arya.
Arya: That’s your Majesty to you but sure. Friend face?
Tristan and Nymeria: PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!!!
Arya: Don’t you think it is strange that the sky is always dry and sunny? And we have oceans that we can’t swim in?
Arya: I think that soon the heavens will open and clouds will cover the sky and wet stuff will fall from the sky turning the world white.
Joe: That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Now your craziness is going too far …
Fine then. You aren’t good enough for my Arya anyway
Arya: OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!! *phone rings* Hold that thought a second … Hello? What? The police you say?
Arya: OH NO!!! ADAM, THE POLICE ARE COMING! GET EVERYONE OUT NOW!!!!
Adam: I DON’T NEED THIS CRAP!! GET LOST EVERYONE!!! THE PARTY IS OVER!!!
Tristan: Not fair. I didn’t get to talk to the hot red head yet
He literally stood there watching Arya for the entire party. He would actually fit in well in this family!
Look, it’s a fairy police officer! That’s so cool.
Arya: Are you here to bring me my wings? I have been waiting for mine since I could walk and the unicorn forgot to bring them when she visited. It is very hard being a fairy princess without them … not impossible, but difficult.
Fairy Police Officer: I haven’t brought you wings, but I am going to call your parents. You are in so much trouble.
What a bitch. The house is clean and all the kids are gone. She has no proof we threw a party
Ceridwen: I can’t believe this Arya. We trusted you and you turn around and throw a party? I know it was your idea. You’re grounded you hear? GROUNDED!!!
Arya: So this is how it’s going to be? You are going to throw me in a dungeon and I will starve to death and then I’ll be released when I’m all old and grey and I’ll have to fight a dragon? Is that it mother?
I think Arya has watched Sleeping Beauty a little too much …
Ceridwen: We left you in charge of the house and your sister Adam. How could you be so irresponsible? You’re grounded for a week young man.
Adam: Oh man. How is that fair? I’m only one man. If Arya gets an idea in her head then there’s no stopping her!!
Poor Adam … It really wasn’t his fault. Arya was the one who threw the party, but Adam got to share the blame.
Adam: Zzzz I’m the son of Satan and Aphrodite is my hell hound Zzzz
I think this is the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen Adam do. This picture is also appropriate, because Aphrodite will be moving out with Adam if he doesn’t get voted as the heir.
Arya: I’ll show them. No one is going to lock this princess in her tower …
Franco: How dare you leave the house Arya! You heard your mother … NOW STAY INSIDE!!!
Arya: But dad, one only went to school!
Maybe Franco should be concerned about his youngest son making shady deals with vampires in the middle of the night. I think he and Ceridwen are in serious denial about the nature of their son.
Tristan: So it’s a deal then? Five barrels of the mixture will be delivered here on the night of the next full moon in exchange for your sister Arya?
Asriel: Deal …. This will make me rich and pretty soon I will be able to afford my freeze gun and then all of Moonlight Falls will be mine.
Apollo: Dad was right. These bed things the humans use sure are comfy. All I need now is some breakfast in bed and I’ll be set.
Bonehilda: Another doggy? I don’t think I’ve met you before little one.
Eika: A walking, talking pile of bones? Yes, that’s perfectly normal to me. At least I’ll never go hungry.
No snacking on the skeleton maid Eika! Also, you might have noticed that the kitchen and skilling room have changed over slightly. I got annoyed with everyone getting congested in the tiny kitchen so I switched the two rooms around. The house flows much better now.
As the great seduction plan with Bailey here didn’t work out at the party, Adam invites her over for another go.
Adam: I know I’m not a werewolf or a vampire, but I’d be willing to change into one for you baby.
Bailey: That’s ok … the son of Satan is much more powerful and exotic than a measly old vampire. Plus, werewolves molt everywhere and you don’t want to know about the fleas.
AND HE SCORES!!! Aww, they grow up so fast *sniff*
Adam: Do you want to go out with me? I promise to always climb into your room and watch you sleeping.
Bailey: But that’s what I like to do
And so begins the epic love story of Adam Bookabet and Bailey Swain …
Bailey: When do we move to the bedroom part of this relationship?
No Kristen Stewart jokes here, but I swear Bailey is a nympho! Whenever she looks at Adam, she thinks of a bed. The Bella in the Twilight books was exactly the same! Speaking of Twilight, I’m off to see Breaking Dawn Part 2 in a hour as I’m such a geeky loser I hope I manage to post this before I go …
Arya: Back again for more I see, Sir Left-Hand? You might have escaped my clutches last time, but no more I tell you. You will cross me no more.
Arya: Maybe one more time …. To my rescue, Sir Right-Hand!
Arya: Not you too Sir Right-Hand! Resist his mind powers and defeat this traitor!
Asriel: This sister is very strange and would make an excellent minion. I am sure she can be persuaded to join my ranks. Too bad I have offered her to that vampire in exchange for my … supplies. Maybe she can become a spy in enemy quarters?
In case you were wondering, a couple of days have passed since the party, and Asriel has showered since. He’s just really, really bad at potion making and is ALWAYS blowing himself up. This look probably suits his character more anyway.
Asriel: How about it sister mine? How about you become my minion so that we can take over the world. Preferably with a rocket … it’s more fun when things explode.
Arya: Rubbish young one. For one thing, I am older than you and destined to become the greatest Queen Bookabetia has ever known. I will not let you blow up my kingdom. Besides, it is protected with fairy dust. Everyone knows that.
Arya: It is prophesised that PEACH COBBLER WILL RAIN FROM THE SKIES AND DROWN HE WHO ATTEMPTS TO DETHRONE ME.
Arya: Remember this little one, and I may yet let you live.
Asriel: I will not forget this. You will rue the day you turned your back on me.
Asriel: I don’t need her help anyway. I’m perfectly capable of building a rocket all on my own and then she will pay. Prepare my laboratory at once Nymeria!
Nymeria: I can’t, it’s a … a … a … GNOME!!!!!
Asriel: *sighs* Must I do everything around here? I really need better minions. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. MWAH HA HA HA HA
Arya: And they call me insane.
Anita: It’s my birthday tomorrow and I don’t want to get eaten by Bertie before I become a teenager. Let’s make sure he’s asleep before I climb into bed.
Anita: Yep, Bertie. He’s a monster and he lives under my bed. He’s ok most of the time but he likes to eat children sometimes. You can tell by the colour of his eyes. They’re yellow right now so I’m safe.
I thought it quite funny that the child named after a kick ass vampire slayer and monster hunter is the first kid to check for monsters autonomously. She’s living up to her namesake
Asriel: Mummy? What does radioactive mean? I noticed a label on one of the bottles in my lab and it said it was radioactive? Is that bad? Will it kill people? That would be so much fun.
Yes, he’s managed to blow himself up AGAIN
Ceridwen: That’s nice son.
This, my friends, is the face of denial.
Anyway, as promised, it’s time for the twins birthday party, complete with Bailey the uninvited stalker in the background. As Alice was born first, she gets to blow her candles out first …
Kudos to Alice for growing up autonomously in her favourite colour. Too bad it doesn’t suit the picture I have of her in my head. She grows up with the Good Sense of Humour trait to add to her Bookworm, Good and Grumpy traits. She sure likes the letter G, this one.
Anita goes next, looking a bit scared of her manic younger brother behind her. I don’t blame her!
I do blame her for her new trait though! Inappropriate of all things! Why do I get all the extreme traits in one generation?! Is that fair?! She is now an Inappropriate, Absent-minded Bookworm who loves the outdoors.
I imagine her to be a bit of a tomboyish rock chick, so here is Alice after her teenage makeover. She rolled the same LTW as her twin sister, despite them being so different in personality.
The girls are still identical in looks, but a makeover can solve that! I’ve always thought of her as a girly girl, so here’s Alice after her makeover. I’m happy with how both girls turned out
That’s it from me for now, but the next chapter won’t be far behind. I’ve got enough pics for that chapter and then I’m going to hold the heir vote. Will Asriel ever build his rocket? Will Arya ever find a spare pair of fairy wings? Will Adam ever get to China? Find out next time on the Bookabet Legacy. I’m off to the cinema now. Bye *waves*
Gelert: I’m finally out of the house. Thank god for that! The smell of burning flesh is too much for my nose … I want a holiday